Thursday, 24 January 2013

#KindnessChallenge Day 12: Forgive Someone‏

I am way behind with this challenge, but I am notorious for never forgiving people! In fact, MrM laughed at me just yesterday because I frequently say that I will never forgive people unless they say sorry or seven years pass.

He reminded me that there is a couple that he has known for a long time and when MrM and I got together, he wanted me to meet them. They were horrendously rude that day - barely acknowledging my presence and then speaking to me V-E-R-Y slowly lest I didn'[t speak English. (I do since I was born in the UK and in fact, my English is better than theirs). I had desperately wanted to make a good impression and felt extremely let down by the experience. They've been the same ever since, and I am hardly minded to be friendly to them.

Seven years elapsed last year and then Mrs Self-Absorbed managed to annoy me again, prompting MrM to roll his eyes and say "so you're now going to hold your grudge for ANOTHER seven years?"

I am quite aware that I am being ludicrous but at the same time, I find it hard to forgive as it seems sometimes to be an admission that the other person has "won". But if I spend time and energy getting annoyed, then they have won, haven't they? It's far easier to be the bigger man and simply forgive and treat people well, whatever they say and do.

So, Celestine from the challenge says:

"Forgive one person
1.Identify a person whom you resent or bear grievances towards. The grievance can be over one small action he/she did or something serious (such as breaking a promise or cheating on you).
2.Why do you bear grievances towards him/her? Write down the reasons on a piece of paper, for your personal reflection.
3.Work on letting go of these grievances today."

This has worked an absolute treat. Writing down the grievances such as "they were rude to me on my wedding day" makes me sound ridiculous. Just let it go already!

And just why does being self-absorbed annoy me so much? What it is about that behaviour that irritates me so much? Does it point to something about my own behaviour and personality that needs to be changed?"

Also, just let go! It's so time-consuming and stupid to be angry all the time. I highly recommend letting things go and in fact, I'm going to ask MrM if he wants to invite them over for lunch.

Wish me luck!!

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